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falling back into the trap.. [02 Feb 2010|02:02am] [ mood | melancholy ] disgusted. suffocate

About 2 Months.. [17 Jan 2010|01:20am] Until I get married! Woohoo! So much to do, so little time! I am feeling the wedding stress, for sure lol. suffocate

work couldn't be more boring.. [23 Dec 2009|11:35am] Cmon, American Express, let us go home!! Gah it is slow as hell, why are they not letting us leave early? :( 1 covered in smoke suffocate

[27 Oct 2009|11:44am] A LITTLE FREAKED OUT RIGHT NOW... and hoping for the best!! 5 covered in smoke suffocate

[18 Sep 2009|10:41am] Jack comes home in less than 2 weeks! I absolutely cannot wait. I will be bursting with happiness that day. 5 covered in smoke suffocate

Oh and btw.. [01 Sep 2009|05:33pm] [ mood | mellow ] BEST. SITES. EVER. www.fmylife.com www.failblog.org Want to laugh? Go here. Seriously. 1 covered in smoke suffocate

Homecoming [01 Sep 2009|05:30pm] Jack comes home in about 30 days, if not sooner. THANK GOD. I'm ready to move on from the no-fun, abundance of responsibilities (school full-time and work full-time, gewww,) and lack of-any-type-of-support lifestyle I've been living. When in crisis, you really learn who people are.. How many claim to be friends but can't be bothered to do something as simple as return a phone call or text or, God forbid, INITIATE a phone call or text.. The guest count at my wedding might be smaller than I thought! At least I'll have more $$$ for my honeymoon lol. Smaller.. but just as wonderful because the person that understands and loves me most in this world will be back soon.. And I am grateful :) 1 covered in smoke suffocate

a lot [01 Jul 2009|05:17pm] of bad stuff happened today, but don't really wanna talk about that. DID get my wedding dj booked though :) Word to the wise: NEVER plan a wedding with a fiance who is overseas!! LOL. VERY VERY difficult. 1 covered in smoke suffocate

anyone know [16 Jun 2009|06:57pm] [ mood | frustrated ] how to get a job at a non-profit organization? I'd love to work with a non-profit org planning events for charities for a living but can't seem to find a single one.. They are either not based in AZ or their websites have absolutely no information on how to actually get a job there. Help? 1 covered in smoke suffocate

Lately. [15 Jun 2009|06:54pm] [ mood | okay ] It's been hard. I feel like I'm spinning in circles with my eyes closed, not sure of where I'll fall, or when. I try so hard to be there for other people and I just feel taken advantage of... I don't want to be the friend that's only there when someone needs something or needs someone. I want to feel important and valued- I'm getting married and my fiance is overseas and it's so stressful and hard and all I want is someone to be there. I don't expect anyone to be there 24/7, but asking for a phone call once a week isn't too much, is it? I'd drop everything for people and knowing that I wouldn't get the same back just hurts. And sucks. It's funny to me that my fiance, who is in Baghdad and had a 10-hour time difference, can find the time and love for me to call almost nightly and I can't get that from people who live a couple of miles away from me.. I used to wonder why, as adults, my parents didn't have an entire grip of friends. So many people seem to think of themselves and themselves only, what's convenient for them, when its convenient. I know everyone isn't like this and for those who aren't.. You really do make a difference to those whose lives you touch. Having someone to rely on, no matter what, is so precious and sometimes you don't realize how important it is until you don't have it. And I really do miss those people, even the ones that I can't count on, because I'd be there for them in a heartbeat, no matter how I feel currently. I thank God, everyday, for Jack. He has been there no matter what. I thank God for those few people who really have been there, who make me smile, who are concerned about my feelings and who allow me the opportunity to be concerned about theirs. I love you all <3 7 covered in smoke suffocate

wow. [10 May 2009|08:43pm] The nerve of some people. On the other hand, the shittiness of others makes me realize how amazing my fiance is. He sent my mom tiger lilys with a note that made her cry for mothers day and he sent me tulips with a beautiful note also, just cuz. I love him so much <3 2 covered in smoke suffocate

I'm blonde!! [04 May 2009|08:33pm] [ mood | hmmm ] yep yep. IDK if I like it.. I've been hit on seriously 4-5 times by guys 30 or older.. eww. I don't know if the blonde hair makes me look slutty or old in this case lol. ignore the absence of make-up I have on lol 4 covered in smoke suffocate

Wedding opinions!! HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!!! [08 Apr 2009|01:31pm] [ mood | nerdy ] I know no one really pays attention to this page anymore (if I were you, I wouldn't either lol) but I need opinions for my wedding!! Any unique ideas you can think of that would make the wedding special? I'm looking into a possible butterfly release when Jack and I have our wedding kiss :) Also looking at caricaturists to possibly hire during the reception, which would make things fun for our guests... or maybe having a caricature of me and Jack done before there wedding and having THAT signed instead of having a guestbook. What do you think? Ideas please!!!! 2 covered in smoke suffocate

If you watch tv.. [07 Apr 2009|05:37pm] [ mood | enthralled ] You should check out Obama's visit to Camp Victory today in Iraq :) That's the camp that Jack is at, and my mom and I are pretty sure that we saw Jack right behind Obama!! We'll see I guess but it's pretty cool regardless! If he got to meet him, he better have gotten me an autograph haha I <3 Jack!! and Obama!! hehe suffocate

Sooo excited!! [03 Apr 2009|06:29pm] [ mood | ecstatic ] I'm getting back $2200 in taxes on April 17th!! I am beyond excited. This means I can fix my tooth (which has been cracked for 4 years now, which people tell me is not noticable but makes me extremely self-conscious,) pay my car insurance early (I pay every 6 months so it's a huge payment to make,) and hopefully get my wedding dress soon!! I'm also planning on joining a gym because I'm eating healthy and have been for 1.5 months (go me!! i didn't think I'd last this long!!) but toning is also important... even though I absolutely loathe working out. I am kind of excited about it though, mostly because I want to see results lol. YAY MONEY!!! STUPID PIECES OF PAPER THAT MAKE THE WORLD GO ROUND. 2 covered in smoke suffocate

Lost... [17 Mar 2009|06:45pm] [ mood | excited ] ... 3 lbs this week! Yay!! Food shopping is my new hobby lol. It's like finding clothing at a flea market.. Searching through a vast amount of stuff before finding something awesome.. Yes, that is me with food lol. Since I'm too lazy to cook for myself (yes, yes, I know,) I've been buying tons of lean cuisines, smart ones, fresh veggies, nonfat yogurt, string cheese, fresh fruit, ect. And since of course I never know what I want until the day I'm actually eating, I'm spending so much money at the grocery store because of course it's cheaper to eat shitty food than something good for you lol. I can't remember the last time I ate red meat, which is really weird for me cuz that's my fav!! But I DID cave in today and got teriyaki beef jerky, which I am strangely in love with. Some people at work told me I looked like I lost weight today and they don't even know I'm dieting, which of course made me pretty excited. I think this is the first time I've eaten super-healthy and actually stuck with it for an extended period of time (it's been a complete month without ANY sugar, red meat, potatoes, ect) and I'm excited that I'm finally losing!! Slowly but surely, I suppose, which I guess it better than losing tons of weight right away that I gain back or not losing at all. I want to look AMAZING for my wedding. I have a year, so I figured why not start now? I'm getting a gym membership in June (it's a class I'm taking, lol, so I know I'm going to HAVE to go whether I want to or not, which is certainly motivitating in itself!) and I'm thinking of getting a bike soon. Even though it's crazy hot here already (like 90's..) biking at night sounds awesome. Finally, a positive entry from me!!! suffocate

[15 Mar 2009|06:58pm] [ mood | okay ] I'm really excited to go see the wedding venue I'm interested in. If anyone's curious and actually reads this thing anymore, it's www.antiqueweddinghouse.com. The inside isn't too great, but the outside is super pretty and that's where the wedding and reception is going to be anyway. I'm going on the 27th to check it out. It sucks not being able to plan all of this with Jack.. But hopefully he'll be back in time before I have to make every decision by myself. It may be many girl's dreams to have their wedding completely their own way, but I want this wedding to be as much Jack's as it is mine. Missing him like crazy. suffocate

The good and bad [01 Mar 2009|08:34pm] Good: I'm engaged! Jack proposed on Feb 6th and of course I said yes :) We set the date for April 10, 2010 since that's the first day that we met. Had a great surprise welcome back party for Jack and we went to Vegas during his 2 week leave, which was fun but so surprisingly cold!! Of course, being from AZ we dressed totally inappropriately and froze our asses off lol. We also went to the Renaissance Festival, which was pretty cool. Brit is coming out to visit for my bday in June, which I'm so excited for because she's never been here and years always go by before I get to see her again. I got bangs, which I'm psyched about cuz I tried something totally new and actually LIKED it. Bad: Jack's back in Baghdad now. I won't get to see him again until September. Most of my friends out here suck and hardly make any time for me, even though it's pretty obvious tha what I'm going through is tough. So I spend about 1-2 days a week with friends (primarily Tony,) and the friends I thought would step up and be there for me haven't been at all. I occupy my time with work (ugh) and school (boring.) It's sad to find out that when you really need people, they could care less. Almost everyone I know who I am/was close to at one point is completely selfish. School sucks, and is boring. It's sad that I'm majoring in communications and with the exception of my gender class, I've disliked every single class I've taken in my field of study. Is it so bad to just want to be married and be a mom? Maybe a little 1950's, but hey, that's my ideal I guess. PIX are up on my myspace if anyone wants to see. The link to my myspace is on my profile. If you can't find it, just search Laura Martin in Glendale AZ and I pop up there :) 1 covered in smoke suffocate

blah. [25 Feb 2009|06:31pm] You Are An ENFP The Inspirer You love being around people, and you are deeply committed to your friends. You are also unconventional, irreverent, and unimpressed by authority. Incredibly perceptive, you can usually sense if someone has hidden motives. You use lots of colorful language and expressions. You're quite the storyteller! In love, you are quite the charmer. And you are definitely willing to risk your heart. You often don't follow through with your flirting or professed feelings. You break a lot of hearts. At work, you are driven but not a workaholic. You just always seem to enjoy what you do. You would make an excellent entrepreneur, politician, or journalist. How you see yourself: compassionate, unselfish, and understanding When other people don't get you, they see you as: gushy, emotional, and unfocused What's Your Personality Type? suffocate

Jack left [02 Nov 2008|10:01am] [ mood | sad ] My bf left for Iraq on Nov 1st, 2008. He's going to be there for a year.. first, stopping in Texas to train until about Dec 1st. He'll then be going to Kuwait for in-country training, and finally to Baghdad. Me, I'm trying to be strong and not to blubber like a baby over this.. I want us to make it, have faith that we will, and am well aware of how hard it's going to be. Hopefully, I'll have a good support system for me here and I'll get to talk to him semi-often. Please pray for him, and for us. <3 3 covered in smoke suffocate

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